More than Granola

A friend from high school went through a phase of calling me "granola" in my young adult years.  I was always into something natural it seemed to her:  wore my hair fairly plain, used little makeup, insisted upon natural childbirth, breastfeeding and having our babies at home. We did, and still do, something most would consider radical: We plan our family naturally; one hundred percent organic, no harm to my body, or my husband's; convenient, free, fairly easy to use, and good for us too! Why this has not caught on in the midst of mass hysteria over organic foods and non G.M. (genetically modified) produce, is a mystery to me. 

 
I would like to say that we steered clear of contraception because we were Catholic and understood the meaning behind the Church's teaching. This understanding came later. We got hooked early on to Natural Family Planning for the plain and simple reason that it just made sense. If my body was only designed to be fertile part of each monthly cycle then why not read the signs and abstain from marital union periodically, when necessary? A man is fertile, by the way, all the time. He is easy to read. 

Natural Family Planning brings to my marriage something that could not come from contraception: communication, self mastery, trust, and a daily charted record of four symptoms of my fertility. Days have rolled into weeks, weeks into months, and then decades, of sharing in the most intimate way all of who we are as man and woman, husband and wife.  With both of us sharing the responsibility for our fertility, talking and praying about God's plan for our family, we bond emotionally as well.   

My challenge for all married couples is this:  If periodic abstinence is the one and only natural way to plan a family, why not consider it?  If a steady diet of good things, like granola, can sustain us in a way that nothing else can, consider what would happen with a 100% organic approach to fertility?

Caring for our bodies takes effort and requires just the right mix, the right ingredients, time and care.  Why would we expect anything less in the care and nurturing of our marriages? Expect more than being natural.  It's more than granola!

Click here for previous post on Church teaching

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More than Words

 Vows and promises.  We remember the vows; the part about being true in good times and in bad, in sickness and in health, all the days of our lives.   There is another part of the ceremony that is often times forgotten:  The wedding promises to the Church community:

"Do you come here freely and without reservation to give yourselves to each other in marriage?  Will you love and honor each other for the rest of your lives?  Will you accept children lovingly from God and bring them up according to the law of Christ and his Church?"

WeddingCeremony-©GavinSpencer

Most of us understand the first two questions.  It is the third question about children that is misinterpreted and misunderstood.  

What exactly does that mean, "to accept children lovingly from God?"

The answer is gift wrapped in what the Church understands marriage to be.  

If marriage is a true reflection of the love of God; if God's love holds nothing back;  if God's love is given and received freely, totally, faithfully and fruitfully, then our love as husband and wife must also be complete, generous and fruitful. 

 

As Catholics we believe that we renew our vows and promises each and every time we unite as one body in the conjugal act.  

Our love cannot be rendered sterile..... ever, because God's love is not sterile.

Contraception interrupts the natural order of union and the potential for life.  It is a contradiction of the very nature of God and the nature of a married couple who is called to reflect the reality of God.  The Catholic Church has never and can never condone such and action..... ever. 
     
What the Church is asking is for us to be open to the possibility of children in each and every act of marital union.  If this is not possible for serious reasons, She asks that we abstain from relations during the fertile time. 
  
All couples must prayerfully discern when they have a serious reason for postponing, sometimes indefinitely, a pregnancy.  Each and every marriage and situation is different.  What is clear, is that all married couples are called to responsible parenthood, in which the dignity of every person in the family is upheld.
 "Humane Vitae"   

 In regards to learning ones fertility, it is much more scientific than in the previous method of counting calendar days.    People who come to our classes are often amazed at how a woman's fertility can be interpreted and charted.  Yes, it takes some effort and communication, but don't the very best things in life take some extra effort?  
Natural Family Planning class info

When we come to the altar to be wed what a gift the Church offers us.  In order to unwrap the gift, we must take it into our marriages and live those words; those promises; to understand all the blessings that God has for us.  
     
A marriage is more than vows and promises.  It is more than words can say. 
Additional NFP resources